Taking a 3 year old to a supermarket is like running a gauntlet of tantrums for toys, embarrassing moments, bowel movements and destruction of shelves. At least one of these things ALWAYS happens when I take Jovan out. As soon as we enter a supermarket he scopes out the toy aisle and his grip gets tighter around my hand as we come close to it, He starts to lean towards it like a magnet. God forbid we walk straight past.
Another common issue: We take him to the toilet as we come out of the house, get to the supermarket, take him out of the car…..’Daddy I need the toilet’….aaaggghhh. Do I a) drive all the way back home and risk wee in the car b) ask him how long he can hold it c) take him to the public toilet but play crystal maze trying to avoid touching anything and finding creative ways to construct contraptions to touch the essentials. I think i almost redecorated a Starbucks thrown with toilet paper once.
Anyway, the hardest situation to deal with is bumping into pre-school friends! I took Jovan to the supermarket and as I was casually browsing for some cured meats he tugs at my arm and says ‘Daddy, she’s from pre-school’, ‘Who, Joey?’ I say ‘That girl there’ he says pointing to a little girl sitting in a trolley smiling while her mother and grandmother look at the shelf next to me. So I told Jovan to be polite and say hello but I look down and he is pointing at her saying: ‘I am not saying hello to you, you bash me don’t you, tell my Daddy, you bash me all the time so I will not be saying hello, ok’. Instead of being concerned for my son being ‘bashed’ at pre-school by this girl, I was more concerned that her mother and grandmother would hear and I would have to engage in some awkward conversation about it. Luckily, they didn’t hear so I thought I was free…nope…as we walk around the trolley, Jovan is staring this girl out and shouts…wait for it…’you have horrid hair anyway, your hair is HORRIIIIIIIID’ . So I take the tactic that alot of parents take and try to talk over him so they don’t understand what he is saying, but as I talk, he gets louder and louder. It quickly escalated from an innocent meeting of pre-school peers into a potential abuse case. Thankfully I saw someone I knew and was able to distract him. Exit secured!
Lets hope we bump into more pre-school bullies because Jovan is ready to expose them!